You and your family are cordially invited to join us for a joyous Thanksgiving dinner on Thursday, November 23, 2017 at 6:00 p.m at our home. In celebration of this holiday, we’ll express our gratitude by needlessly devouring the tortured remains of a turkey. We’ll place the dead carcass (with her feces removed, of course) in the center of the table and engage in cognitive dissonance as we feast on the slaughtered bird’s body parts.
Unwilling to evolve by aligning our actions with our values or show compassion for animals, we’ll continue to honor cruel and senseless traditions to which we have no meaningful attachment. If questioned by people who advocate for a more humane world, we’ll justify our meal by reminding them that the pilgrims ate turkeys even though it’s a myth.
As a guest in our home, you’ll have a choice between eating the flesh off a dead turkey’s legs that she would otherwise have used to exercise and play, wings she would have used to protect her babies and provide warmth, or her breast she would have used to huddle and love her young.
Thanksgiving wouldn’t be Thanksgiving without eating a turkey — a telling commentary on those of you joining us. We somewhat look forward to seeing you to celebrate the ruthless killing of this sweet bird that nuzzles up against people like a dog! Please RSVP by checking one of the following boxes:
[ ] Yes, I plan on needlessly eating a slaughtered turkey even though I have other delicious options. The suffering of others doesn’t matter to me.
[ ] No, I will not attend unless you plan on celebrating a compassionate Thanksgiving.