Prayers Begin for Next Mass Murder and Hurricane Victims

Following a terrorist attack by a wealthy, white American male in Las Vegas Sunday, Senator Ted Cruz (R-TX) led a prayer vigil on the Capitol steps with members of Congress, including Speaker Paul Ryan (R-WI) and Majority Leader Mitch McConnell (R-KY), in anticipation of the next natural disaster and terrorist attack.

“We expect much worse to come so we’re going to pray now,” Cruz explained in a quiet voice.

Dozens of cities across the country began printing #strong t-shirts to prepare to demonstrate their strength in the face of preventable tragedies. Hashtags #DenverStrong and #ClevelandStrong began trending on Twitter. As of Monday, #VirginiaStrong t-shirts were a top seller on Amazon.

“We’re #CharlotteStrong!” said Charlotte Mayor Tom Catskill. “We’re ready to mourn the tragedy headed our way, albeit unprecedented flooding or a terrorist attack from one of our own.”

Republican politicians praised their inaction.

“We need more prayer, symbols, and moments of silence,” said Steve King (R-IA), a lifetime member of the NRA and climate change denier. “This is not the time for action. It would be in bad taste for anyone to suggest that we take steps to mitigate the effects of greenhouse gases or apply more stringent gun ownership requirements while our fellow Americans mourn the loss of people who died as a result of us not taking action,” he added.

Americans expressed shock that violence exists in a country with more guns per person than any country in the world, where the President of the United States threatened to nuke a country of millions of people and encourages violence at his rallies, where countless people with mental illness with unlimited access to guns don’t receive the treatment they need, and where previous mass shootings have happened repeatedly.

White House Press Secretary Sarah Huckabee Sanders said it’s much too early to talk about gun control. She added that the country will need at least a dozen more mass shootings and millions of people displaced from destroyed homes and flooding before any action on guns, health care, or climate will be considered. Sanders said she is going to wear her flag pin to bed to honor the lives lost in Las Vegas.

Sanders shared a letter from a 6-year-old boy named Billy in Kansas who said his dream is to dust and vacuum the White House Green Room. “We’re making Little Billy’s dream come true,” Sanders said while hoisting a Dirt Devil vacuum over her head.

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