Star Wars Fan Scaring Neighborhood

Los Angeles, CA – Stanley Tuttle, 42, continued to weird out the neighborhood this weekend by donning a slew of vintage Star Wars costumes. Tuttle, who still remembers standing on line to see Star Wars at the movie theater in 1977, admits he saw it three times the first day it was released.  “My life, it changed” said Tuttle, who answers all of his questions like Yoda and sometimes dresses as an Imperial stormtrooper depending on his mood.

Neighbors have repeatedly complained to police that Tuttle is scaring their children. “He wears a Darth Vader helmet while he’s mowing his lawn,” said neighbor Bonnie Wharf. “He told my four-year-old daughter that she lives on the Death Star. It’s confusing her.”

“That lunatic challenged my son to a fight with his lightsaber at the bus stop,” said Lynn Rendon, who added that she drives her child to school now. “I tried dressing as Princess Leia so I could reason with him but he just kept telling me it was my fault that Alderaan was destroyed.”


Police obtained a search warrant and raided Tuttle’s home. They found several Luke Skywalker figurines in their original packaging, boxes of unopened Star Wars trading cards, an array of Han Solo and Chewbacca iron on decal t-shirts, and a droids lunchbox in his bed. “When we asked him to trust us that his neighbors would stop complaining if he would act normally, he told us that Anakin trusted the Sith Lord Darth Sidious and was converted to the Dark Side,” said LAPD officer Brad Gusack. “When we left for an emergency call for a car accident, he was just breathing heavily through his Darth Vader helmet.”

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